Things I Should Be Grateful For…

Little known fact. I’m not a pessimist. People think that, like I wake up and think “oh another shitty day… poor me.” But no, I wake up ambivalent about everything, just like a lot of people do. I don’t naturally perceive things negatively. I’m simply a realist… who is rarely an optimist.  See?  Hope for the best, prepare for the worst… as much as possible.   And just because my life sucks, doesn’t mean I can’t be positive about it.

So after being inspired by someone I used to know, I decided to make a list of things I’m grateful for.  So come along and ride on this fantastic voyage.

THINGS I SHOULD BE GRATEFUL FOR

My Detective’s Brain– It gets me in trouble a lot because I often jump to conclusions, but I love the way my brain naturally pieces the world together like a jigsaw puzzle.  The whole world, people, environment, sights and sounds, all of it… is a giant tapestry weaving together into wondrous beauty.

And of course, as I mentioned earlier, the practical end of that is that I am subconsciously trying to figure out how everything connects all the time.  Like I said, it gets me into trouble sometimes (patience not being one of my virtues) but it’s really interesting trying to find out how things, and often, how people work.

A World of 3 Dimensional Sound–  Sometimes I get in those stupid arguments with friends over questions like “What would you rather be, deaf or blind?”  And everyone always says deaf.  Not me.  Being blind would suck, but I wouldn’t want to live in a world of endless silence.  When you close your eyes and listen, a whole new world opens up for you.  A world of 3 dimensional sound.  The sound of laughter, of music… a lover’s sigh… another’s cry.  In deafness, that world is gone.  And you are the worse for it.

Art–  I don’t come from artists.  No one in my family is artistic in the slightest.  I, however have always been fascinated with every aspect of art. I’ve spent a large portion of my life exploring every inch of it.  Well past painting, I’ve endeavored to study photography, the culinary arts, comedy and even grifting.  Anything is an art if you love it enough and make it yours.

My Wandering Soul–  I’ve spoken many times about my gypsy spirit.  So much of me is pure nomad, that aches for the world of Kerouac, back when it wasn’t impractical to get in your car and discover America. Where I’m from, people don’t travel much further than Baton Rouge.  The people are born there and they die there, like their parents, and their parents before them.  But I’ve always been a gypsy and those borders could not contain me.  I’ve been from one side of this nation to the other.  Lived in three states total.  And though I long for more, wider landscapes and farther shores,  I’ve seen more than most.

An Independent Spirit- The world can often be divided into Bears and Sheep.   Being a bear can be a lonely road most of the time, but it’s a necessary road that I walk.  The world needs more people willing to defend their beliefs alone and to the last breath.  More and more, we live in a world of sheep.

A Pragmatic Mind- I’m not technically conservative, though I often represent myself that way.   As much as I hate liberal thought, I actually do agree with some of their opinions. SOME.   I just don’t agree with the blind faith and lack of logic which they apply to the majority of their opinions.  And similarly, there are things conservatives take for granted that I disagree wholly with.  I’m sort of an independent state unto myself.

The Gift of Books- My Mother started buying my books when I was around 5.  Every time she would bring them home was like Christmas to me.  Dr. Suess and Walt Disney.   Then as I got older, my interests grew.  I studied Arthurian legend and Greek myth.  Eventually that grew into my love of comics, which still haunts me today.   And now I’m a writer.  And it was all because my Mom bought me Green Eggs and Ham.

A Few Good Friends- I’ve never had a whole lot of friends.  It’s difficult to find people who accept me and want me around.  But I have a few.   We’ve stood together through life, death, birth, love and loss.  They remind that I have a place in this world.

Sense of Humor- The only solution to tragedy is comedy.  My sense of humor has gotten me through every pain I have ever had.  It keeps me smiling when there really isn’t anything to smile about.  Some days it’s all that keeps me sane.

The Strength to Get Up Each Morning- It seems like such a small thing, but it really isn’t.  There are so many days where I want to give in.  I want it all to end.  But it doesn’t.  Nor will it.   But I get up every day and try to do better.   And that’s a miracle that some people in my position don’t feel.   There but for the grace of God.

My Family- They are all that matters to me.

That’s what I came up with.   Not bad for me.

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2 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Loree on July 15, 2008 at 6:13 am

    I actually like you quite a lot. And I’ve missed you.

    Reply

  2. I guess we’ve both been gone a bit lately.

    Thank you Loree, I’m sorta fond of you too.

    Reply

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