Ambition

I’m approaching 30 fast.   On most levels it isn’t that big a deal to me.  30, after all, is just a number.  Is 30 really that much more mind-blowing than 31? And you’re that much closer to dead at 31.  But still.  We’re given a certain amount of time on this Earth to accomplish our tasks.  And I haven’t accomplished much of anything.  It bothers me.  I have no intention of leaving unfinished business when I’m gone.

You may have read my list of things to do before I die.  But what I have in mind right now is more urgent.  I have a To Do List.  It’s about self-improvement.  Some are obvious.  LOSE WEIGHT.  That’s on everyone’s To Do List.  But there’s things that feel more immediate with each passing day.

I was thinking the last few days about things I want.  A new car for instance.  I want to buy a Pontiac GTO.  Or a Cadillac STS.   Something nice.  Something sleek and sexy.  Also, I could use a new computer.  I’ve settled on an iMac as my next goal.  I want one.  A lot.  My intention is to buy one soon, but that is contingent on job status. I’d been looking for a part time job for months.  Nothing has come up.   And today I realized I was thinking too small.

There’s this girl at my work.  She’s not my boss, but she is technically above me.  I’m a cashier, she’s a service writer.  That never bothered me until I found out she’s a year younger than I am.  I assumed she was a year older.   She’s younger than me and making more money.  That just kind of sucks.  I’ve been thinking too small for way too long.

But today is different.  Today I am feeling ambitious.  As I told a beautiful young lady, today I’m feeling hungry.

I have a business venture in mind.  A big one.  And one I plan to make happen.  But that’s long game.  In the short term, I have decided to find a new job.  I spoke to my bosses about possibly being a service writer.  They were very receptive, which I find surprising.  Also I plan to speak to the Sales Manager about possibly working as a salesman on Saturdays.  I think I would rather be a salesman than a service advisor, but either way would be a step in the right direction.  I need to be better.

This is good.  It’s a little scary, but it’s good.

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